Best Elite 25 Team Names
The results are in. With the help of our friends at NASA, the Baseball Youth Department for Analytics, Sabermetrics and Intermediate Quilting has crunched all the numbers and compiled the definitive list of the best team names in all of travel baseball. Using a methodology which took into account more than zero but less than two factors, our mathematicians have unlocked the secret to what makes a great team name.
“It wasn’t easy,” said Dr. Dustwish Leatherfragrance. “In order to trigger the supercomputer’s meticulously calculated algorithm, we had to do a lot of math. Also probably science. So instead of doing that, which sounded pretty hard, we just picked the ones we could find cool .gifs for.”
I know, my head is spinning too. So enough with the preamble. Let’s name names.
10. Bronx Bombers (NY)
We’re a sucker for history here at BY and this ode to New York Yankees’ historic nickname makes us think of pinstripes, prestige and timeless swagger.
9. I AM Baseball (FL)
It’s a bold claim, but having a clear sense of one’s self is an important life accomplishment. Just ask America’s office manager.
8. Stickmen Pizarro (LA)
On the surface, a stick man may not seem intimidating; however, aside from being a creative play on offensive prowess, stickmen can come together to achieve amazing things. Check it out.
7. La Mirada Coyotes (CA)
Outside of the NHL’s Arizona franchise, it’s tough to find a sports team with a coyote mascot, which is one of the reasons La Mirada’s team name stands out. Just watch out for roadrunners!
6. Team Francisco Notorious 9 (NY)
There’s an old saying that goes something like “If you can’t be good, be bad.” Now, we wouldn’t advise taking this mantra too far, especially if you value your free time, but a little bit of confidence can go a long way.
5. Chino Hills Thunder (CA)
They say thunder is just a noise, but that’s not entirely true. Thunder is, in fact, the noise lightning makes, so when you hear that rumble you’d better head for cover because the storm is coming.
4. Big Stix Gamers (GA)
As we’ve noted, sometimes it pays to be brash, to wear your confidence on your lapel; however, there is another school of thought, mostly famously espoused by the 26th President of the United States. It goes like this:
3. Motor City Hit Dogs (MI)
The Hit Dogs went ahead and joined together two of our favorite things: baseball and chili dogs — specifically coneys, which have been a staple of Michigan cuisine for over a century. We don’t know if there is such a thing as a perfect day, but if there is, it probably involves baseball and coneys. Sonic gets it.
2. NJ Axemen (NJ)
The lumberjack has become an American euphemism for strength — I mean, have you ever tried to cut down a tree with an axe? It doesn’t go down like it does in the movies. It’s likely that Paul Bunyan had to cut and shape his own baseball bats. No word yet on if the Axemen do the same, but we did get a look at one of their training videos:
1 Kangaroo Court Roos (FL)
To be honest, this was actually kind of an easy call. A wholly unique nickname with a tenuous (at best) connection to baseball, the Kangaroo Court Roos nickname is as amazing and fun as it is random. To show our appreciation, here’s a similarly random and tenuously connected .gif.